Where did March go?

Let’s see… What’s new?

I met someone, thought he was pretty great, realized I was wrong. Oh well… At least I got flowers on my birthday:)

Got a call back from a company in Portland that I applied to last July! Man, this job hunt is taking forever. At this rate, I assume I’ll hear something from the jobs I apply for this week in… oh, seven months? What the hell? But, I’m still excited. I am supposed to have a phone interview next week. This is the job that got this whole thing started. The ad kept finding me, and then I realized that I had actually applied for the same job a few years back. That’s got to count for something, right?

I’ve been working with my new student for a few months now. She’s a really cool woman. I just hope I’m helping her and not wasting her time. Teaching an adult to read, write and comprehend is not as easy as I thought! But, I like to think we are making progress.

Work is insane. I can’t even describe the craziness without the fear of being fired. But it’s nuts. Luckily, I have gotten to the point where I just sit back and enjoy the soap opera. I am fortunate to know that I can always walk away, unlike so many of my coworkers. I have finally learned to let the drama happen around me, instead of to me. It makes it so much more entertaining.

I’m finally gonna get to play some poker tomorrow–it’s been entirely too long. T. is back in town, so the gang’s all in. Let’s hope I can make a good showing.

Just booked a trip out to Colorado to visit P. and the little G. Can’t wait to meet his preciousness. Bonus–my bro will be there for a race, so I’ll get to catch up with him as well.

What else? A crazy man with a gun keeps holding up people in my neighborhood. They need to catch this guy soon, ’cause it’s getting kind of “Summer of Sam” around here. People are loathe to be outside for too long, and they are scurrying way too much.

Hillary Clinton needs to go away.

OK, that’s enough.

The In Between

There is something that has been on my mind a lot lately, and I’ve sort of alluded to it in other posts. But I can’t quite put my finger on it, so this may be muddled. For that, I apologize.

I feel like I’m right in the middle of In Between. I’m not upset by this, and I think it is necessary, but I don’t really know how to get from here to there.

So now you’re asking yourself, “What the hell is she smoking?” Fair enough, but I’m not smoking anything more than my usual Marlboro.

I quit drinking a little over seven months ago. In the process, I walked away from a lifestyle that is the only lifestyle I’ve known as an adult. Both before and after leaving the bars, I began to make other important changes in my life and relationships, and all of this has brought me here, to the In Between. I see the In Between as a time to get to know myself and to think about where I want to go from here.

The thing is, I’ve always been pretty in touch with that. Now I find myself in my own city without many friends or commitments and I’m not sure how to get back in the game. As I’ve said before, everyone in this town is either in a bar or a church, and I don’t fit in to either of those worlds anymore. I don’t mind being in bars, but I really don’t have any desire to renew the friendships I had with the people I spent time with there. And I am completely at a loss for how to meet new people.

If you had asked me a year ago how many close friends I had, I would’ve given a ridiculous number. Because at the time, I did have a large group of people around me and I considered them all friends. But now, I can honestly say I can count them on both hands, and every one of them lives elsewhere. I know I can consider myself lucky in one sense, but I miss having people here to spend time with. And, I find myself becoming more and more isolated. I haven’t even hugged someone since my parents at Christmas. That’s pathetic. I love hugs.

But this is the In Between. And I’ll get to the other side eventually. I know that it will all work out for the best; it’s just hard right now.

I have been making efforts to get more involved around my neighborhood and in the community, and I am sure that eventually everything will fall into place. But it would be nice to have someone here.